1 month and counting

I’m feeling pretty out-of-sorts today. I attribute this to 1) planning fatigue and 2) stomach trouble (which may themselves be related). We have a lot to do in the next month, and all I can think about - when I’m not mentally making lists - is whether the caterer will mess up the curry chicken, and how much of a mess the apartment is right now. Fortunately, I have nothing to do tomorrow night so a thorough cleaning is in order. The curry chicken will just have to take care of itself.

Today seems as good a time as any to remind myself of why we’re having this big stupid party to begin with. A little over a year ago, on a Sunday near the beginning of May, E and I woke up late to sun streaming through the windows. We stayed in bed for a while, enjoying the morning and each other’s company, and then threw on some clothes and went for a walk to the National Cathedral. I’m always up for a walk (last weekend I made E walk home to Dupont from Friendship Heights, on a whim) but I didn’t realize that this particular walk was part of a larger plan.

We chatted and strolled, getting sunburnt and looking for 4-leaf clovers along the way. When we got there, we made a beeline for the garden - I love the good-smelling roses there, and it’s a nice place for quiet contemplation among the buzzing insects. E sat down on a bench, and I flitted about taking pictures of flowers and smelling things. Eventually he coaxed me onto the bench, and I noticed his hands trembling slightly as I sat down. He turned to me and started a short speech. Neither of us remember the exact words, but he talked about how we are a good team, and how we balance each other, and how he’s happy when he’s with me. And then he asked: “Would you maybe want to marry me?”

MAYBE.

I GUESS.

I should say at this point that, while I expected that we’d probably get married eventually, I wasn’t really in any hurry. I'm not really the like-it-put-a-ring-on-it type, (though I do dearly love that song). E and I had been living together for nearly a year, and dating for three and a half years (minus an ill-advised but very necessary two-week blip). I figured if nothing changed in another couple of years I’d just do the proposing myself, but it was all very theoretical. So I was genuinely surprised, but happily so, and happily said “Yes” immediately.

JUST KIDDING.

First I said, “Really? Reeeeallly???” Then I said “You know I’m kind of crazy, right?” Then I tried to crawl into his lap, in the middle of the public garden. Then, after (I believe) some prompting from E, I said, “Well, yes, OBVIOUSLY.” And then “Are you sure?” I think E ended up saying “Yes” more often during the conversation than I did. He also gave me a beautiful rose-shaped ring from a fabulous vintage jewelry store near our apartment. We smooched and held hands, and then went to the Cathedral gift shop because I had to pee. A good friend called while I was in the bathroom, allowing me a little time to squeal privately. Then we went to Two Amys for delicious delicious pizza and wine, and called the parents on the walk home. (My father's reaction when I told him that E proposed: “Proposed what?”) The rest of the day was snuggling and sharing the good news with friends and family. Also tending to minor sunburn.

It was pretty nice.

Taken right beforehand.

Ode to Odors

Every year around this time I give in to my nose at the farmers market and take home an enormous armful of some good-smelling plant or bush.  Last year it was lilacs:

Yep, that's Caddyshack in the background.  It was a good afternoon.

We somehow missed the lilacs this year so this weekend I compensated with an enormous bouquet of mock orange blooms.  They're pretty simple-looking flowers, but they smell a lot like honeysuckle and the bunch was so enormous that it practically functioned as a parasol as I was walking through the market.  When we got the bouquet home and into water, it looked like we planted a bush in the middle of our apartment:

This is an awful picture.  iPhone & apartment-cleaning fail.

The flowers were also a good excuse to play around with our new camera:

I am still getting the hang of this whole "focusing" thing.

But!  The plot thickens.  After I brought home my lovely mock orange branches (which, by the way, are you supposed to just lop off huge amounts of branches of a bush/tree just for the flowers?  This makes me feel kind of bad), my infinitely resourceful future husband chose the same afternoon to pickle ramps in our kitchen approx. 5 feet away.  I don't usually mind the acrid smell of vinegar wafting through our small apartment, but this aggression against my fragile dewy blossoms would not stand!  E has a notoriously awful sense of smell, so he didn't have any problem with the situation, plus he had just cleaned the kitchen a bit so I couldn't be too annoyed with him.  Instead, I took a nap, and then a shower, because these are good things to do when one is annoyed for a petty reason, and then I cleaned all the pickling stuff and opened all the windows. And all was well.

In retrospect, I was going to spin this as a victory on my part but I think all I succeeded in doing was being pouty for an hour or so and then solving the problem myself in under 15 mins.  Which is kind of a victory, I guess?  Anyway, the vinegar smell is long gone.  The blossoms still smell delicious and are only just starting to blanket their white petals over everything we own. And the ramps look pretty good too.

The end.

Pretty, and Witty, and . . .

Sometimes reading or listening to the news about the endlessly new and creative attacks that fundamentalist nutjob politicians propose makes me sad.  But the internet doth give even as it takes away.

Have a Takei Friday, everyone.





P.S. I fully acknowledge that my understanding of politics is imperfect, sometimes not up to speed, and frequently characterized by an unbecoming rage.  I also (obviously) feel more qualified to talk about social issues like abortion and gay rights than fiscal matters - though I understand that financial management is kind of paramount when all is said and done, and do my best to maintain some semblance of awareness on that topic.

My Cup (of Words) Runneth Over

So far, the title of this blog has been partially disingenuous, considering its content.  I do use words here, but I could just as easily have named the blog “UseYourYoutube.”  There are a number of potential reasons for this, some better than others, but either way I do recognize the fact of the situation.

However, (and who didn’t see that word coming?) this weekend I had the rare and wonderful experience of spending an uninterrupted 36 hours with some of the nearest and dearest friends from different parts of the last decade and a half of my life.  I don’t think I can actually convey in words what this meant to me, and I’m not sure I did a good job of conveying it to my friends during the weekend, but I can say that it was . . . just  tremendous.  Although my weekend ended somewhat anticlimactically with some serious gastric distress, the easy rhythm of being surrounded by amazing, familiar, loving people – and the attendant sense of deep gratitude for such – will surely be my major takeaway.   In short, I had a weekend-long Friend-Contact-High™.  It was pretty cool.

On the way home from this adventure, I was thrilled to discover a fabulous aftereffect of the FCH phenomenon, as it will henceforth be known.  I am not a very good car-rider to begin with, and the aforementioned gastric difficulties (happily self-inflicted, I should note) persuaded me that strolling the final mile home in the fresh air would be a better choice than spending any further time in a car, even to chat with the very good pal who was driving.  E was out doing chores in the vicinity of my drop-off point, so we met up, and then he took a cab home carrying my suitcase and the many awkward/heavy things he bought at Target (seriously, how many bags of soil do we really need?).  I walked the rest of the way to the apartment, enjoying the sunshine and occasionally stopping to smell a rose - as I am wont to do.

While I was walking, I started doing what I always do when I’m alone and unoccupied: telling the story of myself, to myself.  This is something I assume everyone does to some degree, though the details and scope may vary - from telling the story of a work day to the story of a relationship to the story of one's whole character.  In my own story-telling, I tend to take a relatively long view. I recognize that such stories can have limited utility, and when shared can be really obnoxious, so I’ve been keeping them more to myself these days.  But as I was walking, words and stories and ideas came flooding through me in a way that they haven’t done much, of late.  I felt eager, even anxious, to get home and write it all down.  I can’t remember the last time I felt so motivated to get home and write.   Being with people who knew me so well, and who I knew so well, for that amount of time (frequently in a hot tub, with substantial servings of wine) opened some aperture in me that had been slowly contracting without my knowledge or consent.  It felt exciting, but not entirely foreign, and I enjoyed the unusual sense of urgency.

As I approached our building, it occurred to me that this feeling is probably the genesis of all the ubiquitous ensemble dramedies/cinematic circle jerks that litter the television and movie landscape.  Gathering a group of friends in one place with no real responsibilities aside from telling stories to each other really does create a synergy that is distinct from everyday and one-on-one interactions.  I still think ensemble dramedies are almost uniformly clunkers, because they are so painfully self-aware (and they so frequently, and inexplicably, end with a pity fuck – e.g. The Big Chill and St. Elmo’s Fire).  By the third ham-fisted speech I’m always reminded of this exchange from Anchorman:

Ron Burgundy: We are laughing and we are very good friends. Good buddies sharing a special moment...
Brian Fantana: Don't say anything Ron; just let it happen.
Ron Burgundy: ...laughing and enjoying our friendship, and someday we'll look back on this with much fondness.
Brian Fantana: Yeah, yeah.

But I have to admit that the Ron Burgundy mindset here is kind of my bread and butter.  I can absolutely understand how screenwriters get FCH after a weekend like I just had and can’t resist the urge to turn it into a self-indulgent movie like Four Seasons. 

I didn’t write a movie today, but I did write a blog post.  Whether that’s better or worse is debatable, but it’s certainly cheaper.

I Can Call You Betty

Sometimes instead of going to bed at night I watch this video four or five times in a row.



When I was a kid, I didn't know what Paul Simon looked like, so I thought the non-Chevy Chase guy was another comedian. I still think Paul's funnier, although I deeply enjoy every time Chevy drops his glass through the bongo stand.

Monday

I have not yet gotten the hang of weekend posting. That's probably a good thing because it means that I was out actually having a weekend rather than sitting in front of a screen writing about it. I'm sure the latter situation will be upon me soon enough.

Either way, I enjoyed my active weekend. I got to celebrate some important milestones with good friends (birthdays, weddings, woo woo!). It's not my place to blog about other people's big events really but I will say that 5-lb gummy bears and Dr. Seuss readings were involved. Also booze, bagels, sparkling conversation, and FABULOUS outfits. High fives all around!

On Sunday E and I took our moms to the Maryland Sheep and Wool Festival. We got torso-sized bags of kettle corn, ate mediocre gyros, watched a sheepdog herding demonstration, fed alpacas, and generally took in the atmosphere. We also came away with 18 new plants for the roof garden, including six tomato plants (to add to the four that are already potted and fruiting), six or so new pepper variants including habaneros, poblanos, jalapenos and thai chilis, and some miscellaneous others (eggplant, purple basil). PLUS some awesome new greeting cards and enough gorgeous pink yarn to embark on my first-ever knit sweater this fall.

E just bought a fancy new camera so maybe there will be pictures later. In the meantime just imagine shorn alpacas standing around looking awkward, like geeks in middle school. Go ahead, it will make your Monday a lot better.

Listen, this was going to happen sooner or later

Happy Friday, everyone!  I have a very busy and exciting weekend coming up.  I hope you get to have the fun and/or relaxing weekend that you require. 


This is not the video that you think it is.

Desire

"If the world were merely seductive, that would be easy. If it were merely challenging, that would be no problem. But I arise in the morning torn between a desire to improve the world and a desire to enjoy the world. This makes it hard to plan the day."

- E.B. White

April Mix

Some of you may know that I have a longstanding tradition of making myself a mix every month.  It started in college, when I actually made CDs, but now I just collect songs on one of the several Apple products which have conquered my life.  I've been doing this with considerable consistency for over 10 years now.

The purpose of these mixes is both aesthetic and autobiographical.  Creating a fresh mix each month pushes me to seek out (mostly) new music, which is exciting and gratifying in and of itself AND (let’s be honest) it makes me feel hip.  (Is there anything less hip than using the word “hip”?  I think not.)  On top of that, each mix also becomes a record of the events in my life for a given month.  I pull in songs that are relevant to the month’s events: concerts, new releases and new discoveries, plus songs that are lyrically relevant to my many and varied feeeeeeelings.  And, because I listen to the mix as I’m assembling it, the music becomes a soundtrack for my everyday life during that month.  I have a strangely strong music-to-location memory, such that a certain song can remind me for years afterward of walking down a particular street or driving on a particular stretch of road.  This is great for me, because my regular memory is kind of crap.

Anyway, here’s my April mix.  Profound it ain’t, but I love it just as I love all of my mix-children.

	Artist	Title	Album	Notes
1	Robyn	Indestructible	Body Talk	I held off on Robyn for a while out of pure contrariness, but the guys from Sound Opinions convinced me with this one song.
2	The Jackson 5	ABC	Anthology: Jackson 5	Rediscovered during wedding playlist preparation.
3	Glasser	Apply	Ring	My newest fave discovery, also via Sound Opinions.
4	Television	See No Evil	Marquee Moon	An awesome friend introduced me to Television over a decade ago (thanks Kerry!); I revisited this song recently after it was featured on This American Life.
5	The Foundations	Build Me Up Buttercup	The Very Best of the Foundations	Also rediscovered during wedding playlist prep.
6	Ce Ce Peniston	Finally	100% Pure Dance	I don't remember why I downloaded this one; I was drunk.
7	Robyn	Dancing on My Own	Body Talk	The Robyn seal has been broken.
8	The Kooks	Ooh La	Inside In/Inside Out	Found this when "shopping" in my own music collection.  If you were the one who gave it to me, thanks!
9	Bryan Adams	Heaven	So Far So Good	Don't hate.
10	Glasser	Plane Temp	Ring	Seriously, CHECK OUT GLASSER.
11	Adele	Make You Feel My Love	19	Thanks to Essence for sharing this album.
12	Tune-Yards	Bizness	Bizness - Single	Again, credit goes to Sound Opinions.  Awesome music video, see below.
13	Paul Simon	Hearts and Bones	Hearts and Bones	A chronicle of Simon's love affair with Carrie Fisher.  The best quote ever about that pairing, by Mike Nichols as quoted in Fisher's amazing memoir Wishful Drinking: "You were two flowers, no gardener."
14	Daft Punk	Aerodynamic (Daft Punk Remix)	Daft Club - The Remixes	Thanks to Mariele.
15	Luscious Jackson	Naked Eye	Naked Eye	What can I say, this song holds up.

As a bonus, here's the awesome/bizarre video for Tune-Yards' "Bizness."

Field Trip!

This weekend E and I were in Boston for his sister's senior recital. She did a fabulous job, and I am pleased to have come away from the concert with a favorite bassoon piece. (Who knew?) We also spent some time with E's family and did a suitable amount of napping, brunching and sightseeing.

View of the Boston waterfront from the ICA

At the Institute for Contemporary Art we saw the original artwork, conceived by David Byrne and executed by Jimmy DeSana, that became the cover for the Talking Heads "More Songs About Buildings and Food."  It's seven feet tall and pretty creepy in person, actually.

Boston was very pretty, but too chilly in April for my taste. But, by traveling north we did get to go back in time to see spring blossom all over again. I must have stopped to smell lilacs a dozen times.

I know these aren't lilacs.  But they are pretty. So there.

After a pleasant lunch on Saturday, we saw a couple taking wedding photos in Boston Common.  They looked lovely and were, presumably, perfectly nice people, but I was kind of horrified by the FIVE-PERSON cadre they had following them around with fancy cameras and tripods.  Including a videographer with a SteadyCam.  Random tourists were taking their picture, assuming they were famous - I wanted to explain that they were just rich and maybe a little touched in the head, but I kept my mouth shut and looked at the ducks.

I am a grown up.  Really.

Boston also seems to cultivate an unusually dysfunctional relationship between drivers and pedestrians . . . and, as a DC resident, I think I know my way around dysfunctional transportation relations. At many intersections, a "Walk" sign will never appear, regardless of the light cycle, unless a button is pushed - and oftentimes not even then. Another set of intersections have the same setup, except without a button. The result of this is that Boston pedestrians are inveterate jaywalkers, while Boston drivers are lulled into an inflated sense of self-importance. Add into the mix a tendency among drivers to clip curbs and you have the makings of a lot of transportation drama. Maybe the weather sufficiently deters pedestrians from braving the streets much of the year, so drivers don't have to worry too much, but E and I were not thrilled about the situation.  Still, we survived to fight another day!